


don't need your heart 'cause I got mine

by blueabsinthe



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Communication Failure, Denial of Feelings, Jealousy, M/M, Marks, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2019-11-16
Packaged: 2021-01-31 16:37:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21449341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueabsinthe/pseuds/blueabsinthe
Summary: He’s left it alone this long, what was one more day?
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 25
Kudos: 115





	don't need your heart 'cause I got mine

**Author's Note:**

> It's been a while. Seriously, dry spells are such a pain. Title is from the Natalia Kills song 'Break you Hard'.
> 
> Also, these two will be the death of me. That is all.

He’s not even sure he would have noticed the mark if he hadn’t been paying attention. They’re packing up their gear after shift one day when Eddie hears Chimney start laughing. 

_“That is a thing of beauty, Buck! Jesus, who gave you that?”_

Even Eddie has to do a double take when he looks over to where Buck is standing. The edges of the mark are jagged, the colour a purple-red, but there it sits. Just above the towel Buck wraps around his waist. Eddie debates whether to make some joke about it, as he watches Buck playfully push Chimney away from him, but settles for turning his attention to his phone. It’s no use. The bruise has already etched itself into his brain. 

Eddie pushes the thoughts about the bruise out of his mind as he shoves the rest of his belongings into his bag and makes his way towards the locker room door. 

He knows to leave well enough alone. Even manages to all the way home. He leaves it for hours, drowns himself in doting on Christopher and compartmentalizing his thoughts. He does his best not to think about the bruise, or who was responsible for leaving it on Buck’s skin. He knows Buck was fast and free about relationships, and really, that particular thought should have been enough for him to stop dwelling on the stupid mark. But it wasn’t.

Eddie is used to being in control, knows what he wants and goes for it. He’s not sure when he’s started wanting Buck, only it felt too long. He’s keenly aware of everything he’s lost and everything he could lose if he pursues this. It’s not a comforting thought.

But, he leaves it alone. Comes up with a million and one reasons why it’s not a good idea. For all the good it does him.

He leaves it until their next shift ends and his eyes spot the bruise again. If Eddie was being honest with himself, he’s surprised he’s lasted this long without thinking about it, but here they were again. Except, as he allows his eyes to travel up to Buck’s, he notices Buck staring at him, and Eddie can feel his stomach flip-flop.

Eddie wants to say something, do something. He wants to cross the floor and shake Buck and let everything he feels tumble out of his mouth like a dam bursting. Instead, he bites his tongue, shifts his eyes away, and heads out of the locker room. He can feel Buck’s eyes on his back the whole way.

He’s left it alone this long, what was one more day?


End file.
